So many things to know when dating
I recently wrote a guide for what to do if you’ve been ghosted. Until recently, “ghosted” was a slang term I had heard and discussed with my friends, but one I wasn’t using on a regular basis. Then I was ghosted by someone I really cared about. We had been dating for six weeks when he just ended all communication with me without explanation – the very definition of ghosting.
It was such a painful experience, and I really found myself without a path to follow, which led me to write the guide for others who experience the same thing. Writing the guide also led me to learn more about the different actions and behaviors people display in the dating world. It was eye-opening. It’s crazy, but in my years in the dating world, I have experienced many of them!
For fun, I’ve compiled some of the more popular behaviors in today’s dating environment, most of which are suspect (or Sus for short!).
Yes, ghosting is a real dating term
Ghosting: when someone you’re dating stops all communication and simply disappears from your life, without explanation.
Bread-crumbing or benching: when someone is interested in you enough to reach out when it suits them, but not interested enough to see you and talk on a regular basis. They’re keeping their options open in case someone “better” comes along.
Haunting: this is the person who ghosted you before and then suddenly reaches out after a long length of time.
Catch and release: when someone appreciates the chase more than the satisfaction of the relationship. You’ll recognize this when someone is very persistent about setting up a date and won’t take no for answer, but then doesn’t really follow through or doesn’t display the same level of interest after a date.
Slow fade: when someone stops communicating regularly and eventually stops altogether. This behavior is not as extreme as ghosting, but it’s still a way of getting out of a relationship without being honest.
Monkeying: when someone swings from relationship to relationship without pausing in between for recovery time. Picture a monkey swinging from branch to branch, only letting go of the branch behind him when he has a firm grasp of the branch in front of him.
Catfishing: beware of this person pretending to be someone they’re not to hook you into an emotional relationship or some kind of commitment without really revealing who they are or meeting you in person.
Kittenfishing: when people make themselves seem way different online than they actually are. It can be with altered/older photos or a profile that exaggerates a person’s accomplishment, interests, etc.
Your actions to be a happy dater
There are a lot of other fun dating slang terms out there, but these are the slang terms for behavior that can affect you and dictate the steps you take in your next dating adventure. The best way to protect yourself from these kinds of behaviors is to put yourself first and expect a lot from anyone who wants to date you.